Confession: I Don’t Have My 2016 Goals Figured Out Yet

Okay don’t freak out! Try not to judge, especially since I’m a sport psychologist so everyone automatically thinks I have everything figured out! I understand if you’re surprised. I am tooIM5 – somewhat. However, I’m okay that I am still in process of exploring and figuring out where I want to direct my energies. But…are you? I ask this is in the most sincere manner because what I have noticed and that for many Type-A driven people/athletes the new year is this deadline to have “it” all figured out. By “it” I mean our BIG GOALS, A-races, B-races, power words, spiritual intentions, sponsors, team affiliates, and most anything we deem worthy enough to share with the social media world.

But guess what? That’s. not. REAL. life. Real life ebbs and flows and the things we want to direct our energies and lives toward take time to figure out.  All because I don’t have a solid conceptualization of what my goals are does not mean I haven’t been doing the work or using my inner and outer resources. For example, just last night I got to talk to my best friend “D”, who lives on the east coast, about this very topic. She is a working professional woman, newlywed, and an amazing mommy to a rambunctious and brilliant three year-old and she still makes time to talk and share the resources she’s come across. She’s the podcast queen! She directed me to some great talks that have been helpful in clarifying my goals. I love this stuff! I love the challenge of exploring, but I’ll be the first to admit that sometimes this process comes with feelings of confusion or lack of direction, but that’s apart of the process.

So guess what, it’s okay to not have everything figured out when you think the rest of the world does OR when you think social media tells you your supposed to. Give yourself permission to trust your own process. No one- not your mother, father, husband, wife, therapist, sport psychologist, coach, BFF etc. knows you better than yourself. Trust yourself and where you are. Then seek resources from your tribe of peeps that you trust. In summary, if you find yourself in the same place that I am it’s all good and you are not alone:) Here are some tips that have been helpful in my process:

Tip 1:  Engage acceptance. Truly and deeply be okay with where you are at.will-you-surrender-400x400Tip 2: Empower yourself to accept that YOUR path is unique, beautiful, different and purposeful <- this DOES NOT have a deadline or need to be stamped with approval on 1.1.2016. Lee_Bruce_002.jpgTip 3: List out your inner resources i.e. character strengths, adversities you’ve overcome, skills, spiritual gifts, unique qualities, anything and everything that remind you that you have what it takes to face the unknown. bruce-lee-quotes-1-638Tip 4: REPEAT your list of inner resources to yourself several times a day.

Tip 5: Stay in YOUR lane and don’t worry what anyone else is doing <- NOT your business.43276846389044211_WnDUWPSa_cTip 6: Engage your tribe, even if it’s only one or two people you trust. Make the time to e-mail, phone or message your peeps to get support and resources that can help you.20131030-194041Tip 7:  Brainstorm, journal, log and write down inspirations, thoughts, wishes, dreams, desires and anything that runs across your mind and falls into your heart.

Tip 8 (most important): TRUST YOURSELF and HAVE FUN! Everything will fall into place, because everything has up until this point.

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I wish you all a wonderful new year to come! Remember all of life is just time, time will pass regardless of how we fill it…how will you fill your next minutes,24 hrs, day, weeks, months and eventually…year?

Shine on beautiful people and OWN IT!

Dr. G

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Dr. Gloria Petruzzelli

Dr. Petruzzelli is clinical sport psychologist and certified mindfulness meditation teacher located in Sacramento, California. She works with elite athletes and sport teams across the country. She is competitive athlete herself and enjoys practicing yoga, spending time with her family and traveling.