Have High Expectations and Low Attachment to the Outcome…

“In life you find that one of the most desirable qualities you can find in a person is flexibility. The ability to change with changing times, to face adversity with the same attitude one would have in facing victory.” – A Guide to a Happy Life

Today, I am reminded that the only thing we can control or change is the expectations we set for ourselves, no matter the situation or the “course” we are on in life or sport. Sometimes we find ourselves “stuck” in life because we wish that life was different than what is. And instead of focusing on what we have we focus on what we do not have, what went wrong, and what should be different… when this happens I take this lesson from DBT skill of Effectively, which says:

The goal of this lesson is to focus on being effective in the present– to focus on doing what works, rather than what is “right” versus “wrong” or “fair” versus “unfair” or “should versus should not.” Don’t cut off your nose to spite your face.

So let’s shift a bit….and as the title says, have high expectations for yourself, grounded in the truth of your being, and in doing so the “outcomes” become more data by which to examine your expectations.

Keep reaching for your peak…..

Quick Race Update:
So talk about expectations…. In my last half-marathon, Urban Cow Half-Harathon 2011, I trained but not as much as I’d hoped and it was a pre-season race so my decision was to use it as an early season baseline. BUT I did something I don’t usually do, I started way above pace and held it through the first 9 miles and then BOOM! my quads tighten and there goes the next 4.1 miles. I finished with a 1:35:32 (22 seconds off of my 13.1 PR) 11th overall female and 5th in my AG…what a SURPRISE! However, I could not tell you the last time I was so sore during and after race, my body was telling me that I didn’t prepare it as much as I should have. Now that’s a lesson in expectations….

Published by

Dr. Gloria Petruzzelli

Dr. Petruzzelli is clinical sport psychologist and certified mindfulness meditation teacher located in Sacramento, California. She works with elite athletes and sport teams across the country. She is competitive athlete herself and enjoys practicing yoga, spending time with her family and traveling.

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